Does this sound familiar? You’re in the middle of a meeting, your inbox is overflowing, and suddenly your chest feels tight and your mind starts racing. Or maybe it’s late at night, and you can’t stop replaying that awkward conversation from earlier in the day you had with the barista at your favorite coffee shop. Anxiety doesn’t always announce its appearance — it sneaks in quietly, hijacking your thoughts and making the smallest tasks feel overwhelming.
In these moments, it can feel like there's no room to breathe, let alone time to pause to collect yourself. But even in the middle of the chaos, there is a way to interrupt the spiral. Enter the STOP technique. This simple four-step mindfulness tool can help you reset in the moment and get back to your day with a little more ease.
Whether you’re dealing with a spike of anxiety at work, a moment of self-doubt at home, or just feeling emotionally scattered, this technique gives you a way to slow down, center yourself, and respond with intention instead of reacting on autopilot. The best part is that it doesn’t require special training or even take up a lot of time. Let’s explore how to STOP the anxiety spiral.
The STOP technique is a short, structured mindfulness exercise that helps interrupt your automatic stress response. It’s often used in cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) as a way to ground yourself in the moment.
The method’s focus is on having you pause long enough to check in with yourself and choose your next move, rather than getting swept up in racing thoughts or strong emotions.
The acronym is easy to remember:
Here’s what each step looks like in real life.
The first step is to pause whatever you’re doing in the moment, even if it’s just for a beat.
So, if your phone buzzes with an email that instantly makes your stomach drop, you silently say “stop” to yourself and hold back from typing for a moment. It’s not about ignoring your feelings, but rather giving yourself permission to press pause before moving forward.
Once you’ve paused, you shift your focus to your breathing and take a slow, deliberate inhale and exhale. You can repeat as many times as needed.
This conscious breathing can slow things down enough for you to continue with a little more presence.
Notice what’s happening both inside and around you without judging it. Internally, you might notice thoughts like, “I’m scared I’ll mess this up,” or experience feelings of tightness in your chest. Externally, you might notice the sound of the traffic outside or feel the chair supporting you.
These observations help you recognize what’s happening in and around you before things escalate further.
Finally, decide what to do next. This might mean continuing a conversation or tabling it until another time. Continuing with a task or taking a break. This step allows you to proceed with intention and a clearer head.
The STOP technique can be applied in a variety of situations, whether you're alone or in a discussion or conflict with others. Here are some of the ways it can benefit you:
The strength of the STOP exercise lies in its ability to interrupt your stress cycle and give your body a chance to reset. In fact, research on mindfulness shows that brief pauses like this can support both your physical and emotional wellbeing.
Here are five common benefits of practicing the STOP technique:
When stress, overwhelm, or anxiety hits, it can be easy to spiral, but the STOP technique offers a quick way to pause and reset. Here are nine ways you can use this method to ground yourself the next time you find yourself stressed.
On overwhelming days, you don’t have to do all four steps. Even just saying “stop” to yourself and taking one slow breath can create enough space to reset.
Try this: Instead of picking up immediately after your phone buzzes, pause and inhale and exhale once. Then decide whether or not you want to answer.
💙 Take a moment to gather your thoughts and emotions by listening to Stop with Tamara Levitt.
STOP usually works best under stress if you’ve rehearsed it in easier moments. Try practicing it when you’re calm, or pairing it with daily routines to help make it more second nature.
Try this: Take a minute to do a STOP cycle before making coffee, unlocking your front door, or clicking “join meeting.”
Adding touch or focus points makes STOP feel steadier. Try pressing your feet into the floor, resting your palms on your thighs, or naming one thing you can see, hear, and feel.
Try this: In a tense conversation, notice if your jaw is clenched. If it is, name it before responding by saying, “I’m noticing tension.”
Different rhythms help different people. Some prefer longer exhales, inhaling for four and exhaling for six. Others like box breathing, inhaling for four, holding for four, and exhaling for four.
Try this: Before a high-stress situation, try three rounds of four breaths in and four breaths out.
💙 Pause to Breathe with Prof. Megan Reitz next time you need a minute to reset.
Big tasks can sometimes feel impossible. If you feel overwhelmed or bogged down, try breaking down big tasks into smaller steps to make them more manageable and less overwhelming.
Try this: Instead of “finish the report,” start with “open the document.” Then once that’s done, STOP again and choose your next tiny move.
Decision-making is hard when you’re anxious, but a short menu of calming actions can save energy. Think of it like an à la carte offering for anxiety relief.
Try this: Have a small list of calming items for when you’re feeling anxious, like stepping outside, sipping water, or stretching for a minute. You can even take a moment to journal what’s on your mind.
Pause during conflict to make sure you’re taking care of yourself. This isn’t avoidance, it’s an act of care.
Try this: Mid-argument, say, “I want to continue this, but I need a few minutes to gather my thoughts.” Then step away, breathe, and return when you feel a little steadier.
Sometimes all you need to do to release some nervous energy is move your body. If you’re anxious, gentle movement or a change in temperature can help your body settle.
Try this: After a tough moment, take a short walk, rinse your wrists under cool water, or hold an ice cube.
Devices often cause stress and overstimulation, but there are ways to use them to your benefit. Try setting up digital alerts to help remind you to pause. You might have a daily reminder to set an intention for the day, or to take a break in the afternoon.
Try this: You could add a 30-second send delay to emails, turn off push alerts, or rename a home screen folder “STOP.”
STOP is an acronym that stands for:
Each of these steps builds on the last to create a short pause between stress and response.
At first, you stop and interrupt autopilot, then you regulate your body by breathing. After that, you observe and gather information without judgment, and finally, you proceed and choose your next step.
The STOP technique can help reduce the intensity of anxiety and stress. When you pause and breathe, it slows your body’s stress response. And when you observe, it helps you recognize what’s happening without immediately reacting to it and gives you a beat to process it.
These steps can calm your nervous system enough for you to make clearer choices, which in turn can lower your stress in the moment.
There’s no wrong way to use the STOP technique. You can do it in as quickly as ten seconds or as long as a few minutes. However, a good way to apply it is to stop and take two deep breaths. Then notice your thoughts and feelings, and after that, decide on your next step.
In general, it can be helpful to start practicing this method in low-stress moments, like before opening your email or before making your morning beverage. This can help the steps feel familiar before your anxiety dips into overdrive.
The STOP method is taught in dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) as part of its distress tolerance toolkit. But it also shows up in mindfulness-based stress reduction (MBSR) and cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) programs.
In DBT, STOP is specifically used to help people pause before reacting to strong emotions. This makes it easier to respond in ways that align with long-term goals instead of short-term impulses.
This technique is often described as a grounding method because it brings your attention back to the present moment. The “observe” step is especially grounding as it directs you to notice sensations in your body, your breath, and your surroundings.
Overall, STOP offers a structured way to ground quickly while also giving you a path forward with the “proceed” step.
Mental health is hard. Getting support doesn't have to be. The Calm app puts the tools to feel better in your back pocket, with personalized content to manage stress and anxiety, get better sleep, and feel more present in your life.
